Slow Down and Optimize Your Life

In 2020, our lives went from 100 miles per hour to about 5 miles per hour. The COVID pandemic cleared our calendar overnight. The kids stayed home, and I quit my part-time job. All the lessons, classes, meetings, events, gatherings, and activities were canceled. It was a strange feeling. It was very lonely and difficult, and yet . . . very freeing. We forgot what it was like to just be at home together without anything to do.

The government shutdown came at an interesting moment in our personal development journey. This rare opportunity to slow down our lifestyle unintentionally slowed down our busy minds too. We discovered so many benefits to a more reasonable pace. We were better focused, more relaxed, better listeners, and more present with our kids. It helped us see our crazy lives from a new perspective.

Here are 7 Ways that you can slow down and optimize your life:

__________________________________________________________________________________

1. Single-Task

My dad was the ultimate single-task master. He would take all the dirty laundry down to the basement and just sit next to the machines while they were running. He would patiently wait for them to finish, so he could switch the loads and complete the job before coming back upstairs. He did not run around the house finding other ways to fill his time. He sat. He waited. For a long time this story was funny to me, and we all thought it was ridiculous that he would just sit and wait when there were so many other things he could have been doing at the same time. Now I look back and admire his singular focus and stillness. It is a very rare quality.

Take the Challenge:

Focus on a single task or goal at a time. Write a daily to-do list in the order that you want to complete your tasks, and stick to it. It can help to rate their importance and prioritize the most important tasks first. Let all the little things wait until later.

__________________________________________________________________________________

2. Breathe

Our daughter, Avery, had always been terrified of getting immunization shots. She worked herself up into a frenzy—her body got tense and she could hardly breathe. Sometimes she even cried, screamed, and made a run for it. But that just made the experience worse for her. When Avery got a little older, she learned how to use some deep breathing techniques to relax before the pinch, and it was much less traumatic for her. In fact, Avery requested getting her ears pierced for her twelfth birthday. I was surprised and impressed, considering her history with needles. During the appointment, she used some intentional deep breathing to relax and prepare for the piercing, and she handled it like a pro. It is amazing how much our breathing can regulate our stress levels and body tension.

Take the Challenge:

Here are two breathing techniques you can use at any point during your day to calm down or relax:

• Box breathing: Inhale through the nose for four counts, hold for four counts, exhale through the nose for four counts, and hold for four counts. Repeat as many times as you like.

• Three-part Breathing: Hold one hand on your stomach and one hand on your chest and breathe through your nose. Inhale and focus on expanding your belly, then inhale again and focus on expanding your rib cage, inhale a third time and expand your upper chest. Exhale and release in reverse order. Repeat as many times as you like.

  
  

__________________________________________________________________________________

3. Be Mindful

After I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes, I looked at the sugar content of all my food and was appalled. I had been consuming ridiculous amounts of sugar all day long without realizing it. Then to top it off, I would sit on the couch at night and zone out to the TV with a big bag of chocolate on my lap. So just becoming aware of my habits and the ingredients of what I was eating changed my actions. I started checking food labels and consciously choosing what to put into my body. I tried to focus on my food when I was eating instead of zoning out. It was my first step toward mindful eating and mindful living. It made me realize how important it is to pay attention to everything you are doing and to choose how you live with intention.

Take the Challenge:

Pay more attention to yourself: thoughts, actions, words, and habits. Set reminders on your phone to stop throughout the day and observe what you are doing. Try to live with as much intention and awareness as you can.

__________________________________________________________________________________

4. Meditate

Like many people, we were once scared off by the word meditation. But when Jake’s depression got too much for him to handle, he tried the “10-Percent Happier” app. It introduced him to meditation as a tool for mental and emotional health. After realizing that meditation wasn’t as scary as it sounds, we began using the guided meditations on Apple Fitness+ and the Waking Up app.

It was fun to choose the length and theme of each session, it could be just a five-minute session about kindness or a twenty-minute session focused on calm. Meditation was whatever we wanted or needed it to be. Since then we have experimented with a variety of apps and meditation styles, and we try to incorporate some version of meditation into our daily routines. After meditating, we feel relaxed, refreshed, and ready to take on the rest of our day.

Take the Challenge:

Begin with an open mind and give it a try, there is no wrong way. Start with just a few minutes in any comfortable position that works well for you. Personally I love lying down, but there is a risk of falling asleep so many people prefer to sit. There are so many online resources and apps, find something that sounds easy and resonates with you. Guided meditations are a great way to start.

__________________________________________________________________________________

5. Practice Yoga

Jake and I began using yoga stretches after jogging to loosen up and recover. We slowly incorporated it into our lives more and more. Not only did it increase our physical mobility, but at the same time it relaxed our minds and utilized breathing techniques. The movement satisfied my need to feel productive and decreased my stress levels. It incorporated so many important elements into one practice. Now, it's one of the most common remedies we prescribe in our household if someone is feeling tense, sore, overwhelmed, or stressed out.

Take the Challenge:

Try some online yoga videos at home, or join a class in a nearby studio. Don’t judge it based on your first awkward attempt; give it at least a month.

__________________________________________________________________________________

6. Feel Better

I used to keep my massage appointments a secret because I was worried that people would judge me for it. That sort of pampering was considered expensive and a waste of time. Growing up the Midwest, we are taught to feel guilty or ashamed of taking time out to care for ourselves. We think it signifies weakness, selfishness, or laziness. But these are the limiting beliefs that are preventing us from living our best life. When we take time to reduce our physical, mental, and emotional stress, we show up better for others, and it generates a positive ripple effect in all our lives. It is never selfish to build and sustain the best version of you.

Take the Challenge:

Do something that makes you feel good every day. Take a bath, take a nap, sit outside, call a friend, get a massage, or simply enjoy a warm cup of tea in the evenings.

__________________________________________________________________________________

7. Be Instead of Do

I used to think that being a good mom was cramming our schedules full and keeping everyone busy. We would race from one thing to the next. But my kids were exhausted and they felt neglected even though we were together. What my kids really needed from me was to just relax and be present with them. They love when I can let go of the schedule and to-do list and I just sit, listen, or play along.

Take the Challenge:

Shift your focus from constant doing to simply being. Designate fifteen minutes per day and be present with someone you love.